Category Archives: Change and Personal Empowerment

Part 10: May Day- Seven Wonderful Wisdom Quotes From Will Smith

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From Wikipedia Public Domain

Continued from Part 9: Life Tests Us  To Perfect Us.  http://wp.me/ppImQ-sG

In reviewing videos, bios, and books on some great motivators this month, I happened across some videos of Will Smith.  And while my initial goal was to focus on a certain era, I was so impressed with some of his wisdom that I had to share it with you.  You know him as a comedian, actor, and musician, but check him out as the motivator.  In the following quotes, Will Smith speaks on, Talent and Skill, Being Realistic, Making a Choice, Focus, Fear, Preparedness, and Protecting Your Dreams.

1. Talent and Skill

“The separation of talent and skill is one of the greatest misunderstood concepts for people who are trying to excel, who have dreams …  There is no easy way around it. No matter how talented you are, your talent is going to fail you if you are not skilled.   If you don’t study, if you don’t work really hard and dedicate yourself to being better every single day, you’ll never be able to communicate with people the way you want.”  “Talent, you have naturally. Skill is only developed by hours and hours and hours of beating on your craft.”

2. Being Realistic

“Being realistic is the most commonly traveled road to mediocrity.  Why would you be realistic?  What’s the point of being realistic?  I’m going to do it.  It’s done!  It’s already done the second I decide to do it.  It’s done.  Now we just have to wait for yall to see it.”

3. Making a Choice

“There’s a redemptive power that making a choice has.  Rather than feeling like you’re an effect to all the things that are happening.  Make a choice. Just decide, what’s it going to be, who you’re going to be, how you’re going to do it?  Just decide and from that point the universe is going to get out of your way.”

4. Focus

“I realize that to have the level of success that I want to it’s difficult to spread it out and do multiple things. It takes such a desperate obsessive focus.  You’ve got to focus with all your fiber, your heart, and all of your creativity.”

“You don’t have to have a Plan B because it distracts from Plan A.”

5. Fear

“I’m motivated by fear.  I hate being scared to do something.  I think what developed in my early days is that I started attacking things I was afraid of.  You can’t be scared to die for the truth.”

6. Preparedness

“Stay ready and you don’t have to get ready.”

7. Protect Your Dreams (from the Movie, ‘Pursuit of Happyness’) 

“Don’t ever let somebody tell you, you can’t do something, not even me.  You got a dream, you got to protect it.  People who can’t do something themselves, they want to tell you, you can’t do it.  You want something, go get it. Period!”

Barbara Talley is a keynote speaker, author of six books, and trainer on value-based living themes.  She also offers Effective Communication, Diversity, Leadership, Time Management, and Goal Setting workshops.  Visit her at www.thepoetspeaks.com or contact her at 301-428-4831.  You may email her at Barbara@ThePoetSpeaks.com.

May Health Chronicles- The Importance of Hope

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What do naysayers, toxic people, and insensitive people have in common with weeds?

Answer: They choke the life out of living things.

“Just make her comfortable,” the cold, emotionless doctor said to us in front of my 83 year old step-mom after giving her only about 5 minutes of his time. “She won’t get any better you know. She’ll never be like she used to be.  She’s got kidney problems and her heart is operating only at 10%.  I don’t know what you expect me to do.”

He didn’t even look or speak directly to her, instead focused his remarks to my sister and I.  I looked over at my step mom and watched as her spirit dropped.  She looked so sad… and hopeless!

You see, she still believed whatever the doctors told her.  For the next few days she barely ate.  This culminated into a trip to the emergency room two days before her 84th birthday. We tried to cheer her up while waiting for the test results by talking about her birthday to come.  “If I make it,” she replied doubtfully.  “Of course you’ll make it,” I said encouragingly.

The emergency room doctor was different.  He told her she would be fine and that she could go home.  “Everything looks good,” he said cheerfully.  “Nothing has changed from your earlier records.  You haven’t gotten any better, but you haven’t gotten any worse.” He patted her on her shoulders attentively while looking directly at her and said, “Take care of yourself now.” She smiled happily and said, “I will!”

Now her heart was still functioning at 10%.  She still had a bad cold and she is still on dialysis.  But, she perked up.  It was all in the presentation.  This doctor seemed to care.  She now had hope.  We celebrated her 84th birthday on May 24, 2010.  She made it!

The following timeless quote of John Maxwell reinforces the importance of caring, “People do not care how much you know until they know how much you care.”

We’re talking about a human life here.  And hope is just as important for dreamers with vision.  Haven’t we been told that without a vision, the people perish?   Vision and hope keep people going.  They keep people alive.  They keep the seeds of your dreams alive.  Seeds are your ideas, dreams, or wishes that spark a desire in you to act and give you hope, purpose, and joy.  Weeds are the people in your life that purposefully or unknowingly douse the fire of your dreams.  Protect your dreams, for they only have you to depend on.

In conclusion, I’d like to end with some words from one of Yolanda Adam’s songs, Don’t Give Up. “Keep the dream alive don’t let it die.  If something deep inside keeps inspiring you to try, don’t stop.  And never give up.  Don’t ever give up on you.  No, don’t give up!”

Part 1: What Are You On?

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“Shush”

“Slow down!”

“Calm down!”

“Indoor voice!”

“What are you on?”

As a child, I was always being shushed, told to be quiet, or to “turn it down a notch.”  In order to fit in I had to walk on eggshells to comply or continually justify myself to others.  Have you ever had those questions directed to you? Have you ever asked them of others? Even though we have been admonished spiritually to “judge not so that we may not be judged,” some do it arrogantly and with a sense of entitlement.  And most do it regularly, instinctively, and harshly.  Too often the question, “What are you on?” or its variations were asked judgmentally or negatively of me, as if there were something “wrong” with me for being so “energized.” Or, the implications were even worse implying that I had to be “on something” or oblivious to reality to be so keyed up or overly happy.

I’m High on Life, Are You?

Other times the question was asked almost enviously, in the context of, “I wish I had an ounce of your energy, drive, or passion.”  To some, I guess I was too strong of a wind that upset the status quo.  To others thankfully, I was and am like a refreshing breeze inspiring movement, change, and energy.  If I am not reserved, quiet, or calm, I must be “on something”… right? Surely I must not be aware of all the painful, unhappy, and wrongs going on in the world. For the record I do not drink alcohol, smoke anything, take any drugs (prescription or otherwise), or even drink caffeinated coffee or soda. I have a natural high.  I’m high on life.

So instead of me thinking something was wrong with me, the correct question should have been, “What’s…

Click to continue article. http://wp.me/ppImQ-n8

Barbara Talley is a keynote speaker, author of six books, and trainer on value-based living themes.  She also offers Effective Communication, Diversity, Leadership, Time Management, and Goal Setting workshops.  Visit her at www.thepoetspeaks.com or contact her at 301-428-4831.  You may email her at Barbara@ThePoetSpeaks.com

Embrace Change or Not?

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I put it off for months.

But finally, I gave in and purchased a new phone. Can, or should we try to keep up with the latest technology?  I’m old school and thought that a phone only needs to do one  thing, make a phone call.  I barely used the camera on my last three hand me down phones and I never used the video.  After all I had a camera to take pictures.  I also had a camcorder gathering dust in the closet that was the size of a loaf of bread that still had a lot of use left in it.    For a whole week while  traveling on business in Indiana in early April  I was without a cell phone.

Can you imagine that?  I went to the Verizon store and was told that they did not make the battery anymore for my Blackberry model and I should just upgrade.  (BTW. I did not have a data plan so I was still using it as a simple phone.)   I declined and went another week without a phone.  Surely I could find a battery somewhere, perhaps on Ebay.  The phone had a lot more life in it.  I couldn’t just throw it away, could I?

Why was I not embracing change like everyone else?

Blame in on Annie Leonard and her forcefully compelling ‘Story of Stuff.’    http://www.storyofstuff.com/ Her cartoon explanation of how we are scared, seduced, and misled into buying stuff that we don’t need really got me to thinking about social responsibility.  I also didn’t want to become a droid and mindlessly give into the corporate scheme of planned or perceived obsolesence that was destroying our planet.

Now, when it comes to the latest software, I’m careful to make sure I get the latest, but I was still holding out on the phone.  Secretly I didn’t want anything that would keep me on the phone any longer than I already was.  I was resenting the fact that people were communicating less face to face and spending more time texting, gaming, social networking, or just playing on the phone.

There is an app for everything.    I had privately scoffed at people who seemed glued to their phones ignoring the people who were right in front of them. I was also highly concerned about the EMF rays.  I’d read reports about cell phone radiation weakening bones, affecting sperm quality, links to brain cancer… click to continue.  http://wp.me/ppImQ-oa

Barbara Talley is a keynote speaker, author of six books, and trainer on value-based living themes.  She also offers Effective Communication, Diversity, Leadership, Time Management, and Goal Setting workshops.  Visit her at www.thepoetspeaks.com or contact her at 301-428-4831.  You may email her at Barbara@ThePoetSpeaks.com

Part 2: Embrace Change or Not?

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Continued from Part 1: http://wp.me/ppImQ-o7

I’d read reports about cell phone radiation weakening bones, affecting sperm quality, links to brain cancer, tumors, and Alzheimer’s, interference with sleep, radiation on skin, and it’s addictiveness.  (Click to find out which phones are safest.) http://www.sarshield.com/english/news.htm

I’d even heard reports blaming the increase of Prostate cancer on the increased use of cell phones because men wear them on their waist belts.  http://www.pri.org/health/cell-phone-use-and-cancer1926.html

And yet I finally gave in and purchased the Droid.  Blame that on my son-in-law who kept encouraging us to check out the Droid.  Within a few days I could see why people were robotic-ally glued to their cell phones.  Within minutes it became apparent what the hoopla was all about.  I was helping my daughter move into her new home in New York and the Internet was not yet hooked up.  So on the Droid I was able to book my flight, check several email accounts, and update my Facebook page.  I then played Poke a Mole with my three-year old grandson.  I even listened to some books on tape while I hemmed curtains.

On the way to the airport, we used the Droid’s GPS to find the airport in Syracuse.  I checked in for my flight on the way using my Droid and checked to see if I could find a window seat.  When I got to the kiosk, I was able to print out my boarding pass by simply scanning the bar-code from my email that was on my Droid screen.  And that’s just the beginning of the 50 apps I downloaded just to see what they could do.

A day after I got home, my 12-year daughter needed help with ‘Factoring Perfect Square Trinomials or something to that effect.  I didn’t have a clue.  So, I did a voice search on my Droid and it pulled up a You-tube video that explained it to her easier than her teacher had.  I cooked dinner for my son who turned 29 and his fiancee.  After dinner my husband made an observation.  Everyone (except him) was on their cell phones.  No one was talking to each other about anything except their phones.  Normally we would be talking, joking around, watching TV together or playing a board game.  My husband is the sole hold-out.  He has a plain phone still.  It’s easy to get addicted to these new phones.  I’m still concerned about the children  growing up on these phones.  My 22 year old would go to sleep with the phone on her ear.  Researchers are concerned about brain tumors or cancer and that it will be years before we see the long term effect from the phones.

http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/07/24/prominent-cancer-doctor-warns-about-cellphones/

So now, I sit here conflicted while writing an article on ‘Embracing Change.”  As with all things, there is a delicate balance that has to be held.  It is possible to get too much of a good thing.  I guess it’s like the song on friendship.  “Make new friends, but keep the old.  One is silver and the other is gold.” We’ve got to make friends with the new technology, but be careful that we don’t lose out on our golden relationships in the process.  Technology shouldn’t replace face to face conversations, spending time with loved ones, and …Hold on my Droid is alerting me that I have a new email…

Barbara Talley is a keynote speaker, author of six books, and trainer on value-based living themes.  She also offers Effective Communication, Diversity, Leadership, Time Management, and Goal Setting workshops.  Visit her at www.thepoetspeaks.com or contact her at 301-428-4831.  You may email her at Barbara@ThePoetSpeaks.com