Who’s Got Your Back?

Who’s got your back, for sure?  AND, whose back do you have?  We are all connected and there is power in unity. We were designed to be there for each other and not just for self. Are you honest, loyal, and trustworthy to those people who rely on you (and to everyone else for that matter)? There is a logical reason beyond the obvious for developing qualities of honesty, trustworthiness, and loyalty. When we are habitually faithful in these virtues, we are sending out powerful loving energy to the universe and attracting back to us the kinds of people with similar virtues as us.

Remember, you attract not what you want, but WHAT YOU ARE.

Who's Got Your Back?Everyone needs someone who they can rely on and trust wholeheartedly to be there through thick and thin.  That’s what true friends and family are for.

If you can’t trust the people who say they are behind you, first check to make sure that you have been loyal to them as well. If you have, and the relationship isn’t reciprocal, then perhaps you need to find those who will have your back. Life is way to short to spend it with people who bring no value to your life and don’t value you enough to give the kind of loyal relationships you deserve.  Just something to think about!

Another message that matters from Barbara Talley.

Seven Life Lessons from Priming the Pump

hand pump fountainDo you remember the  60’s show, Green Acres with Eddie Albert and Zsa Zsa Gabor?  He wanted the farm life and she wanted the city life. I’ve tried both, and I prefer the suburbs!  I  grew up in the country, pumping water, chopping wood, making fires, and with all sorts of  chores. I’d like to say that, “Those were the good ole days, but they were not.”  Times were hard and we worked even harder. Now of course there are few things I miss. First are the people in life back then that are no longer with me anymore, a mother, father, brothers, friends.  Next was the weeping willow tree that I would lie under and dream. Those days did however teach me to work hard.  They also taught me the value of indoor plumbing and furnace heat. (LOL!) Looking back, it makes me appreciate even more what I have now.

I will also always have the memories of “priming the pump” to remind of the value of saving a little, working hard, having the willingness to sacrifice now for the bigger goal in the future, and to remember to take time out to enjoy what I’ve worked for.  The lessons I learned are:

    1. Always Have Faith and Certitude. Smart people rarely go after a goal that they don’t believe in.  We understand that we can’t (or won’t) run towards a goal that we have no faith that we can reach.  If we do, our steps are tentative and unsure. Luckily, we did not doubt as children.  We were showed how to pump and told to do it, and we did, time after time.  We believed; even though we could not see the water underground, we believed that the water was always there. All we had to do was work for it.  You too must also have complete faith and certitude that you have greatness within you and in the goal you are pursuing.  Faith is the key to starting, persevering, and finishing.
    2. Don’t Allow Yourself to Get Empty. We learned to always save a little water to prime the pump for the next time.  We never used our last bit of water, before re-filling our containers.  This relates to our goals in this way. Take care of yourself. It’s okay to help and serve others, but don’t deplete every ounce of your energy.  When you are worn-out, you are subject to all sorts of mental, physical, and spiritual illnesses. My sister would always say, “Stay prayed up!” You’ve got to protect yourself.  If you allow yourself to get too run down or too sick, or too hopeless, it becomes harder (and in some cases) almost impossible to regain your strength, your faith,  or to reach your goals.
    3. You Have to Put Something In Before You Get Anything Out. All of the lessons are important, but this one is the deal breaker. We knew that we had to sacrifice in advance to get something better later.  We had to sacrifice our water, our time, and our energy before we could expect something in return. There is a lesson in this for you too. You don’t get something for nothing. There is no credit in the well of life, meaning “Give me now and I’ll pay later.”  You must pay the piper first. Now the interesting thing was, sometimes if we hadn’t planned well, we’d have to use our last bit of water.  We’d pour the last bit we had into the pump in order to get more.  We were willing to make that sacrifice. The lesson was simple. If we weren’t willing to give it up our water, we would not be able to tap into the unlimited!
    4. You Must Be Ready; No Procrastination Allowed.  Now imagine this, once you’ve poured your limited (or last) supply of water into the pump, then you have to start pumping vigorously.  If you don’t start pumping (and pumping hard), you not only risk not getting any new water, but you will have just lost what little you had of the old.  Once we made the decision to prime the pump, we had to be ready. No procrastination was allowed. There was no time to do something else, make an excuse, or think about it. You had to see it through.
    5. Don’t Stop Until You Reach Your Goal.  Persevering with the pumping was the most critical stage. It didn’t matter how tired you were, how hot or cold it was outside, how you felt, how people felt about you, or anything at that point. You had to focus on pumping and persevere until you saw the results you sought. Sometimes we were lucky, we’d pump a little and waters would start flowing immediately.  Other times, we would pump and pump and not seem to get any results.  Sometimes we would have to add a little more water, some times we had to pump even harder, and other times you just have to pump longer.  The key is that we do what we had to do.  Excuses and quitting were never options.
    6. Give Back! We also learned to keep a certain jug set aside just for priming and we’d fill it before we would habitually fill the other containers so we wouldn’t forget.  The lesson, always give back and save a little.
    7. Enjoy Your Spoils.  Once the water starts flowing, it’s hard to stop it!  Victory is sweet! You have tapped into an unlimited underground reservoir. The fresh water under the ground was always so cold and refreshing especially on a very hot day.  On the cold days, that’s a whole different story.  It just meant that you got to go inside in the warmth and make some hot cocoa or something. Either way, we’d met our goal and that felt good!

That’s it!  Now go prime your own pump and reap your own rewards.

Barbara

What I Learned from Priming a Pump

old-fashioned-water-pump-janice-drewWhen I was a little girl, we lived in an old farm-house in upstate New York that did not have running water or indoor plumbing.  “No, I did not live in the early 1900’s on Little House on the Prairie.  And, “Yes”our neighbors did have inside plumbing. We just didn’t. My dad was a migrant worker and we were quite poor. If we wanted water, we had to work for it, just like we did for everything else. Right outside the house, we had a pump which supplied the water we needed to cook, bathe, and do laundry, etc.

The lesson I learned from priming a pump was that you have to put something in if you expect to get something out. On the success train, there is no free lunch, no credit, and no loafers.  You want to ride, you must pay the price.” Barbara Talley

There is a lesson in every experience when you’re open to learning. We also had one of those old-fashioned wringer washing machines and a rub board, but I digress!)  Every day, rain, shine, snow, or sleet, we’d go out to get some fresh water.  But before we could get the fresh water we had to first “prime the pump.”  That meant we had to take some of the water that was left and pour it into the pump and pump vigorously for a few minutes.  Pumping was always the hardest part for if you stopped before the water began to flow, you’d have to start all over. [We did get strong arms though.] So, we’d pump rapidly and rhythmically until water started to flow.  At first there would be no traction and if you didn’t know any better, you’d begin to doubt and perhaps even stop too soon. But if you continued pumping faithfully, eventually the water would begin to flow and you would barely have to pump at all.  At that point, the water would gush out and we could fill our containers as much as we desired.  We had a hard life back then, but there are lessons in everything.  If you listened to my father who walked five miles to school each day, our life was a piece of cake.

For those of you who have never had to prime a pump, be grateful.  You get to benefit from the lessons without the pain.  I’ve learned however, that we all have different lives, different challenges, and different lessons.  Lessons are made for sharing. Make sure to share yours too. That gives them meaning.  Please enjoy my seven lessons from “priming a pump” in my next blog.

Barbara

Infuse Every Intention with Positive Energy

mastermind carnegieDale Carnegie wrote, “It is the mind that makes the body rich. No man can become rich without enriching others.” Isn’t that the highest goal of our life, to enrich our lives by enriching others? We are powerful; our every thought, word, and action stems from an intention and has a far reaching effect. Each effect is either enriching others or depleting them. Each time you think a thought, open your mouth to speak, or act, you are sending powerful energy out into the world. You then become part of what is healing our world or part of what is hurting it.

Each of us is born with something valuable to share with the world. You matter; I matter; everyone matters. Much of the mental illness, depression, and confusion people experience today is because they don’t realize how much they matter. The daily onslaught of negativity, fault-finding, and discouragement has convinced them that they don’t matter. They mistakenly were looking on the outside for validation of their worth when the answers are inside. Each of us was born to share; everyone’s contribution matters! Find out what that is and share it!

In the Bible it states that after everything was created, God said, “That is good!”  That means each of us has good in us. Let’s make every moment reverent by looking for the good in others and encouraging them.

Wouldn’t it be great if we all were habitual “good finders” instead of “fault finders?”

Each step, each word, each thought, and each action must be infused with grace, kindness, and love for others. Human beings were created to honor, respect, and worship our Creator by honoring and respecting His Creation. I am in no way equating myself to the Omnipotent One, but I don’t think you can honor someone and dishonor what they’ve created and value.

As a mother, a person who wants to show me respect would lose that if they disrespected my children or my creations.  And, if they respected and showed kindness to my children, they would gain favor with me.  I think it must also be so with our Creator. How can we say we worship God (Yah, Allah, or whatever name  we associate with that Most Great Spirit), and yet disrespect, dishonor, and discourage His creation?

Three ways to help you figure out what your unique contribution (if you don’t know) is:

1) What do you enjoy doing? (The world needs more joyful servants who serve with love, kindness, and joy.)

2) What needs does the world have that you can satisfy?  (Find a need and fill it.)

3) What does your spirit inspire you to do during your prayer and meditation? (Don’t know? Ask!)

 “Work done in the spirit of service and to excellence is worship!”

This quote paraphrased from the Baha’i Writings sums it all up for me.

Barbara

What did you do or not do to cause this to happen?

VICTIM OR IN CONTROL?  This morning I was reflecting on the natural law of “cause and effect” and thinking how liberating this law is when we really understand it. We can’t have it both ways.  Either our decisions and input matters and creates or contributes to our reality or it doesn’t.  Either we can initiate, create, mold and shape our reality or we have to wait for input from our environment and always be in a response mode. Our results have a cause.

cause_effect_picWe change the cause and our results have to change too. Our past thoughts, decisions, and actions have created our current realities.  If we want different results, then we have to change the input.

Isn’t it exciting that we are the creators of our reality, that we get to choose?  We get to decide what we will put our energies into and those decisions create the effects we now experience. So many people meander through life following the masses and feeling and acting like victims.  They see the world as pins and themselves as pin cushions, powerless to stop or curtail the pain.  Their primary response to the world is “fight or flight”, and the world from their perspective is a cruel and unhappy place.

Think about it, if you are a victim, then you have no control over the outcome.  If the person victimizing or causing you pain chooses not to change their ways, you’re stuck!  I’d much prefer to own some part of the outcome.  That empowers me to change my circumstances.  “Self-actualized” beings have broken free from the pack.  They realize that they have unlimited power.  They own up to reality and know that what they are perceiving, they had some hand in creating.

In my workshops, I frequently encourage participants to answer this question to help them take credit or responsibility for their actions. Owning up to the life we have created causes us to cease feeling like victims and that is empowering. Whenever they look at a specific reality that is not to their liking, they must answer the question honestly:

“What did I do or NOT do to cause the the happen or NOT TO happen?

Barbara