You Could Have Been An Onion!

You Could Have Been An Onion.

You Could Have Been An Onion.

Stop!

Before you complain again about anything, appreciate the fact that YOU HIT THE CREATION JACKPOT.  You could have been an onion, slug, a roach, or a piece of sand. Instead you are blessed  to be human beings, to have the potential to mirror the attributes and qualities of God, and to be so valued and trusted as to be given consciousness, free will, and dominion over this world. Just think about the billions of  creations in this magnificent world of ours.  There are untold numbers of fruits, vegetables, plants, insects, birds, fish, organisms, and animals.  And yet, if you are reading this, you hit the creation jackpot because YOU GOT TO BE  A HUMAN.

“Humans have conscious thought and are aware of their consciousness. With this power, we can create or destroy, love or hate, believe or fear, take from others or serve them unselfishly. Circumstances may not be to our liking, but at least we have the capacity to change things and that’s the miracle and blessing of being a human.  Humans can create new reality.  Humans can make new and better choices.  Humans can willingly choose to change their circumstances through decisiveness, commitment, and focused action.”

Barbara Talley is a professional speaker, poet, and author.  Her presentations focus on vision, values, and virtues.  You can find more about her programs at www.ThePoetSpeaks.com

Sometimes Changing Course is Wisdom And Not Quitting

Darwin-change-V2

We’ve heard, “Winners never quit, and quitters never win!” Winners win because they’ve learned to not confuse activity with accomplishment. Winners continually assess their options and take the best route to their dreams. The don’t quit their dreams, they just change vehicles when necessary. Their ultimate loyalty is to their dream and not the vehicle.

It’s not illogical to jump a little ship stuck in the harbor to get on a yacht sailing around the world, if your goal is to see and change the world.

Just like every car has a spare tire, every ship has a life boat. The life boats are there for a reason.

And finally, it might be advisable to those who have invested time, energy, and sweat in an endeavor that is not working to read the book “Who Moved My Cheese’. And finally, remember, Charles Darwin’s advice, “It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent that survives. It is the one that is the most adaptable to change.”

I’m Barbara Talley, the poet who speaks and inspires.  To find out more about me check out my promo sheet or visit  my website.

‘Save the Children’ American Mother’s Inc. Maryland Chapter Event Highlights

The Maryland Chapter (MOST), Mothers and Others Serving Together, is proud to share the highlights of our “Save the Children” event held on Sunday, December 16, 2012 in Clinton Maryland.  Barbara Talley, current Mother of Year for Maryland offered a rousing keynote address touching on the recent tragedy killing twenty-six people in the Sandy Hook Elementary School in Connecticut but also linking that to the former tragedies in Virginia Tech (2007), and Columbine  (1997).  She reminded the audience that a society that doesn’t learn from its mistakes is condemned to repeat them.

Authors and Panelists at the 2012 'Save the Children'

“Photography courtesy of Fred Reaves Photography”

Mrs. Talley (a mother of six) pointed out why we can’t wait until our own children are affected to step forward.  She passionately explained,  “All children are our children.” While these tragedies are horrific, she reminded the audience about the 8000-9000 deaths annually of African-Americans (mothers, fathers, children) that go unnoticed, which is so much more than the 6400 U.S. service men and women killed in Iraq and Afghanistan combined over the course of a decade-long war. She challenged the audience to care about all of our children and families through her version of Martin Niemoller’s poem about the apathy of the majority of the Germans while different groups were being targeted and exterminated.

First they came for drug addicts and their addicted babies and children, and I did not speak out because I was not a drug addict and my children are not on drugs.

Then they came for “criminals” and I did not speak out because I was not a criminal.

Then they came for the high school dropouts, and I did not speak out because I was not a high school dropout.

Then they came for teen moms, single moms, the run-aways, and the foster kids, I did not speak out because I was not a teen mom, single mom, a run away, or a foster kid.

Then they came for the poor, unemployed, the uninsured, and the homeless, and I did not speak out because I was not poor, unemployed, uninsured, and homeless.

Then they came for me, and there was no one left to speak for me. (by Barbara Talley)

She directed the audience’s attention to the common thread running between all of the recent atrocities in the three schools mentioned, young perpetrators (barely children themselves) between the ages of 17-23 who were described as gifted, yet remote, awkward, bullied, depressed and disconnected from society.  “How many children do we know that fit this bill?” she asked. She also offered some sobering statistics of the school dropout rates collected by americaspromise.org, citing “one student dropping out every 26 minutes totally more than 1 million a year.” 

Barbara Talley and children, Shawn and Radiance Talley

Barbara Talley and children, Shawn and Radiance Talley- “Photography courtesy of Fred Reaves Photography”

Audience and American Mother's Inc. 'Save the Children Inc.'

‘Save the Children’ Program- “Photography courtesy of Fred Reaves Photography”

These dropouts have a higher rate of incarceration, poverty, joblessness, and little opportunities to secure the jobs of the future, which require post secondary education.  America’s Promise offers five solutions to turn things around, 1) Caring Communities, 2) Safe Places, 3) A Healthy Start, 4) Opportunities to Help Others, and 5) Effective Education.

Next her fifteen-year old daughter Radiance Talley shared two poems on handling rejection, being ostracized, and “not fitting in” in school when one is trying to be virtuous, chaste, and drug-free in an environment insensitive to diversity. Her two poems ‘All Alone’ and ‘Keeping Myself from Sinking’ were met with thunderous applause from the audience.

After highlighting the issues brought to light by AAUW (American Association of University Women) on the prevalence of harassment in schools (56 percent of girls and 40 percent of boys reporting experiencing some of form of harassment), the distinguished panel of authors, educators and activists shared their experiences and solutions.

Mr. Clifton McKnight, Professor/Counselor at Montgomery College, and author of If You Can’t Calm the Waters, Learn to Ride the Waves offered this advice. “Be a part of an organized effort to make a difference. If you don’t want to join something, start something! Do what you can, when can, for who you can, while you can.”

Mr. Derrick Terry, former teacher, Special Education Advocate and Author of, I’m Not Complaining, I’m Just Sayin: Memoir of the Good and Bad in the Educational System.  “In order to have common sense education reform, we can’t continue to allow the small few to make decisions for the greater good without little input from those responsible for executing these final decisions,” he offered.

Mr. Charles Cary, Author, Actor, and Singer shared an overview of his personal struggle from addiction to surviving cancer in his book, Courage Facing Mortality.   “You have been created to do a work …it’s not your job, it is your purpose!

Mrs. Virginia E. Hayes Williams
 Community Activist, former Mother of the Year for DC and Author of Living Under God’s Umbrella shared her wisdom of the importance of parental involvement in our children’s lives, saving our own, and the importance of teaching personal responsibility, virtues, and respect.  She said we shouldn’t ask others to save our own until we’ve done all we can ourselves.

Terry Tabor,Educator/
Author of Helping Mom Fight the Bad Cancer Bubbles, co-written with D. Whalen-White talked about  the work that the Greater Council of Schools is doing to support educators and schools and shared how a grandmother takes the delicate subject of cancer and puts it into words that a little child can understand and be of help to her mom who is dealing with cancer.

Many thanks go to the  entire MOST committee, VP Sharon Parker (Membership), Cerise Hart (Secretary), Terry Tabor (Logistics), and Sheila Chambers who were present and supported the event.  Photography was courtesy of Fred Reaves.

I’m Barbara Talley, the poet who speaks and inspires.  To find out more about me check out my promo sheet or visit  my website.

Don’t Just Sit There!

Zig Ziglar wrote: “Even if you’re on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there!” 

track- get movingIf we’re not moving, we need to figure out why! I’ve realized that I can’t do my best if I was not at my best.  No matter how talented you are, you too can’t do your best if you are not at your best!  Things can’t be alright if you are not right. We can’t give or attract what we don’t have.  Fortunately, we are resilient beings.  Through prayer, meditation, reflection, fasting, and journaling, I’ve learned to work my way back to “my normal.”  My goal is not to be like anyone else, but to be the best me.   I am now more confident than ever that we can have anything we want in this life, if we want the right things, are willing to do what’s right to get them, and have the will to work for whatever we want right now.  We also need to have the right people in our lives.

Doing the Right Things

What do you want out of this life?  Are your goals lofty or lowly, prideful or purposeful, serving others or self-serving, mediocre or meaningful?  Working harder won’t get you closer to your bliss, if you are not on the right path. The goal is not necessarily the gold, but to have golden relationships, golden memories, and a life full of golden and meaningful service and accomplishments.  I truly want to make a difference, but I also have financial needs.  My challenge was (and still is) to find the right balance.  I can’t tell you how many times people contact me wanting me to speak for free, even though this is how I earn a living.  No one would ask a doctor, lawyer, restaurant owner, or even a public servant to work for free.  I learned that although my heart was willing to give it away, I had to set boundaries.  I also had to really plan my time well.  I had to ask myself regularly, “Am I doing the right things that will move me closer to reaching my goals?  Am I being truly productive or merely confusing activity with accomplishment?” Once I set the right balance and the right boundaries, it gave me time to focus on the right things.

Doing What’s Right

Fortunately, my moral compass has been set on the right course for quite some time.  I attribute this to a regular spiritual routine of prayer, reflection, and meditation and a genuine desire to “do what is right.”  This was probably the most perplexing to me during my dark moments because I truly felt I was doing the right things, so why were things not turning out right for me?  I realized that just because they weren’t turning out the way I’d planned, didn’t mean that they hadn’t turned out right way or the way there were supposed to in the grand scheme of things.  If I was praying for guidance and being guided, perhaps the challenges were a way teaching me a lesson I needed to learn, making me stronger, or just simply redirecting my course.  I had to have faith and just let go.  So, if you are facing challenges, ask yourself first, “Am I doing what is right?”   And if you can honestly say that you are living a life of integrity, making moral choices, and honest in your interactions with others, just stay the course.  If, however, you have gotten off your moral track, then simply, get back on.

Doing What We Must Right Now

The third challenge is to make sure that we are doing something now and not procrastinating.  Remember, “A body in motion stays in motion.” Sometimes we know what we should be doing, but allow things of a lesser value to take precedence.  If we want to live on purpose, we must get our priorities straight.  To do this, we must set value-based goals, have a plan, and then work that plan.  This requires saying ‘no’ to people, things, and opportunities so that we can stay on track.  We can’t be everything to everybody and still do the work that we were uniquely put on this earth to do.   And in the end, we will be responsible for getting our work done; no excuses will be allowed.  Sometimes the window of opportunity is open for just a short time.  If we don’t act, we lose that opportunity and have to wait for it to open again if ever.  I have a strong belief that we make our own opportunities.  I personally don’t wait for them to happen; I meditate, come up with a plan, collaborate with others, and create my own opportunities.  As co-creators in creation, we have the power through our thoughts, deeds, and actions to manifest the kind of life we choose for ourselves.   Every thought has the potential to manifest as reality, but only if we do the right thing, the right way, and do it RIGHT NOW!

The Right People

“No man or woman is an island.”  We don’t stand alone; we are all connected.  That being said, we still must choose carefully the people in our lives.  Some people are there for a reason, others, a season, and a few are lifers.  We must accept this fact.  We sometimes outgrow our relationships.  Sometimes we need new fresh relationships to stimulate new growth, perspectives, and possibilities.  Sometimes the people in our lives that we care the most about cause us the most anxiety and grief.   I had to let go of a long time relationship with a friend who hurt me very badly during a time that I was most vulnerable.  It hurt me a lot because I was not prepared for it and it caught me off guard.  I’ve been taught to, “Make new friends, but keep the old because one is silver and the other is gold.”  Well, I’ve learned that silver can tarnish and gold can rust.  Relationships have to be two-way, giving and taking.  I’ll leave it at that.

I’m Barbara Talley, the poet who speaks and inspires.  To find out more about me check out: What Does Barbara Do? or visit  my website.

21 Ways to Make Your Home a Fortress for Well-Being

21 Ways to Make Your Home Happier

21 Ways to Make Your Home Happier

You’ve heard it said before, “Home is where the heart is.

But the home is so much more. Home should be where your heart, healing, happiness, and humanity are best magnified. If you don’t show or won’t show humanity, forgiveness, kindness, and encouragement at home, then where?  Your home is your loving lab, where you can make mistakes in a loving environment and grow from them. Your home is the place where you GROW your family and pass on your values.  It gets frustrating worrying about all the bad things in the world and feeling hopeless, so focus your energy on the one place where you can make a difference.  Your home is your first responsibility.  Make it more loving, healing, encouraging, and trusting.

Home is a safe place to dream and expect encouragement and support.  We are truly in a sad state of affairs if our homes do not restore us to wholeness. Even worse, when our homes are the cause of our sorrow, depression, fear, and self-devaluing. Your home must become your fortress for well-being, the place you go to heal, restore, and flourish.  It should be the one place where you can let your guard down and be able to trust. It should be the one place where you will have the most influence. What you DO in your home affects its power to heal.  These are 21 Things we do to make our house a home.

  1. We do second chances, and sometimes third, fourth, fifth, sixth…….infinity
  2. We do grace.
  3. We do real.
  4. We do trust.
  5. We do loud; Sometimes, we do real loud!
  6. We do encouragement.
  7. We do mistakes.
  8. We do, “I’m sorry.”
  9. We do hugs.
  10. We do, “I love you.”
  11. We do prayer.
  12. We do faith.
  13. We do forgiveness.
  14. We do gratitude.
  15. We do service.
  16. We do laughter and lots of it!
  17. We do, “Please!”
  18. We do, “Thank You!”
  19. We do “Excuse Me!”
  20. We do, “Let me help you!
  21. We do, “Let go and Let God!  (a whole lot)

I’m Barbara Talley,  The Poet who speaks and inspires.   To find more about me, check out my promo sheet or visit  my website.