Category Archives: Positive Thinking

The Science of Creating Your Own Luck

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Are you lucky?  Is there a science to luck or is it a spiritual blessing or divine grace?   I am one of those right brain people whose pendulum swings way to the right when given a choice to rely on science or spirit. I tend to look first towards spirituality to explain or guide me with work, relationships, and setting goals.  I also look for the spiritual lesson when I encounter adversity.  So, looking for a scientific explanation of why things are is not my first line of defense.  But, I’m consistently learning that science compliments spirituality and explains things logically.  With spirituality, I don’t have to know why; I just know what is.  But, science explains the why and I am even more confirmed.  For example, I know from experience that prayer and meditation work.  Science attempts to explain why.    But, I’m learning that it is not an either/or choice.  Both are valuable and both play a role.

4 Steps to Create Your Own Luck

Many people would consider me lucky.  I am if the definition is: “Luck is where opportunity meets preparedness.”  Yes I am lucky but I feel that my attitude and faith create my luck.  Richard Wiseman studies luck and has actually come up with a prescription for how it’s done.  You’ll want to read his insightful article, Be Lucky- it’s an easy skill to learn. He writes,  “My research revealed that lucky people generate good fortune via four basic principles.They are:

  1. Skilled at creating and noticing chance opportunities,
  2. Make lucky decisions by listening to their intuition,
  3. Create self-fulfilling prophesies via positive expectations, and
  4. Adopt a resilient attitude that transforms bad luck into good.”

After graduating from his luck school, 80% of his students were luckier.  Scientific or spiritual luck?  Perhaps you don’t have to choose and can have both!  I’m  going to make sure I apply the principles above and for luck, I’m going to continue to pray.  There you have it.  Feeling luckier?

I’m Barbara Talley, the poet who speaks and inspires.  To find out more about me check out: What Does Barbara Do? or visit  my website.

Why Do We Have So Many Negative Thoughts?

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Every thought and emotion has its own energetic signature or wave frequency.  ToeTalkwithTina writes: “Even our thoughts and emotions are energy, and every specific thought has its own unique vibrational frequency. Anger has its own frequency. Depression has its own frequency. Jealousy has its own frequency, etc, etc. Remember…energy MUST move. So when we choose to stifle a negative thought or emotion, and just keep tucking away all those hurt feelings, it is the equivalent of a percolating volcano. Eventually something is going to move….or BLOW!”

Your Assignment

If you believe that what you focus on magnifies in our lives, then you need to make a conscious effort to use and focus on those words that enhance your life .  Here’s  your assignment:  For the next week eavesdrop on your thoughts, words, and your conversations.  How many of your words, conversations, and interactions were positive?

Research shows that we are far more negative words in our vocabulary than positive ones.  Robert Schrauf, associate professor of applied linguistics and an anthropologist at Penn State was quoted in an ABC News on-line article titled, “Study: Negative Words Dominate Language’. ” Schraf says he was a bit puzzled when he began analyzing data he collected that shows that regardless of age or culture, we have far more words in our vocabulary that express negative rather than positive emotions.  …I found this surprising result,” Schrauf says. “Half of all the words that people produce from their working vocabulary to express emotion are negative. And 30 percent are positive and 20 percent are neutral.”

He has an idea of why this is so,”Negative emotions require more detailed thinking, more subtle distinctions,” says Schrauf, whose research was published in a recent issue of the Journal of Multilingual and Multicultural Development. So we conjure up more negative words because the language needs to be precise. And this research suggests that’s probably true for every culture and every age group. Even though some of the words may not have precisely the same meaning in every language, they tend to be more negative than positive.”

Until next time…

I’m Barbara Talley, the poet who speaks and inspires.  To find out more about me check out: What Does Barbara Do? or visit  my website.

The Power of Words

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Words are the building blocks of our communication with ourselves and others.  It is the means by which we exchange ideas, thoughts, desires, fears, needs, beliefs, etc. Negative words produce negative emotions.  Positive words produce positive emotions.  Let’s test it.  Think about debt, clutter, weight, divorce, death, bankruptcy, hatred, or betrayal.  How are you feeling?  Now think about abundance, order, beauty, freedom, fitness, health, vitality, faithfulness, and love. Do these words make you feel different? The challenge then is to use more positive words in our conversations, thoughts, and communications.  The words we use have programmed us and as we use new words we are changing the program.

Words also have ‘staying power’ both the negative and the positive.

Be careful what you put out into the universe because words have staying power.  Once implanted in someones heart or mind, they can grow there forever.  Everyone can recall without much effort a time in their lives when they were hurt by words.  For me, it was being called, “Fish Girl.” My dad had a fish market in Pennsylvania when I was between the ages of seven and twelve.  He would load up fish and produce in the truck and go door to door yelling, “Fresh Fish, Fresh Greens, Fresh Produce.”  Come and get your “Fresh Fish, Fresh Greens, Fresh Produce.”  On the surface it shouldn’t evoke painful memories, but it does.  You see when we weren’t out selling the fish, we were preparing the fish.  We couldn’t go out and play, have friends over, or have a normal childhood.  Most of our time was spent cleaning, scraping, and gutting hundreds of pounds of fish weekly.  The fish came in fifty pound boxes and my sisters and I had to stay up many nights getting the fish ready for sale the next day.  Our hands were cold and frozen and sore from being stuck and pricked by the fish fins.  If this weren’t enough, the kids would mock us to and from school.  They would throw things and us and call us “Fish Girls.”  Laughing at us saying that we smelled like fish.  Yes words can hurt, but words also can heal.  Unfortunately,  children learn the bad from their environment.  Realize that you are now a teacher and a role model for the children.  And, “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything.”

I’m Barbara Talley, the poet who speaks and inspires.  To find out more about me check out: What Does Barbara Do? or visit  my website.

Dream Derailer #9f: Insufficient Education

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Talent and Education Are Not  The Same

What do Halle Barry, Mary Kay Ashe, Michael Dell, Bill Gates, Andrew Jackson, Rachel Ray,  John D. Rockefeller Sr., Steven Spielberg, Mark Zuckerberg, and Henry Ford, have in common?  You guessed it, no college degree.   That just proves that if you have the passion and talent, the lack of a formal education should not stop you from reaching your dreams.  All but one on the list are at least a millionaire and half were billionaires.

If you have the talent, you can go on to be a famous actress, build a cosmetics company empire, or start a computer company at age 19.  You can also become one of the most influential people of your time, the richest man in the world or in history, a talk show host, a movie producer and director, or create a social media phenomenon that would change how we communicate, or even revolutionize the auto industry.

Let Your Talent Guide You

No one would argue that all of the above mentioned non-degreed people are successful.  But none of them allowed the lack of a college degree stop them from reaching their dreams.  They had a passion and a drive and they went after it with all that they had.  Many even had additional obstacles to overcome beyond education.  Mary Kay Ashe didn’t let the lack of money stop her from starting Mary Kay Cosmetics.  Michael Dell didn’t allow the lack of proper facilities stop him and started Dell computers in his college dorm room.

The important thing is that their talent or dream empowered them to succeed.  What is your talent?  My friend and past mentor, Dr. Percy Thomas inspires his students with these words, “Keep your focus on your strengths and not your weaknesses. Life is too short to spend your time on acquiring talents that God has not gifted to you.” But, the talents you are gifted with, give them your all and watch magic happen!  And finally, the Buddha says: “Your work is to discover your world and then with all your heart give yourself to it.”  (Continue to part 2 of this article)

I’m Barbara Talley, the poet who speaks and inspires.  To find out more about me check out: What Does Barbara Do? or visit  my website.

Dream Derailer #9e- Insufficient Talent

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“The best of all men is he who earns a livelihood by his calling.”  This quote from the Baha’i Writings sums it all up.  If you don’t have enough talent, get it!  If you are not that interested, do something else!   Far too many people choose careers for money, prestige, and power instead of by their passion and natural talent.  This can potentially cause problems, because it’s hard to excel when you are not interested in something.

We all have specific natural gifts and talents.

It would be in our best interest to choose careers that allow us to use those talents.  But unfortunately, many people don’t have jobs that allow them to express their natural talents.  It’s unfortunate that some of the jobs offering the most to humanity are so under-appreciated and underpaid.  Harvey MacKay wrote, “Do what you love and you’ll never have to work a day in your life.”  That’s the goal, to do what you love and never stop learning and growing.  When you love doing something, it is not a burden to spend time doing it. And, if you spend a lot of time doing something, you will get better. Ralph Nader lives by this principle, “I enjoy my work so much that I have to be pulled away from my work into leisure.”

I’m Barbara Talley, the poet who speaks and inspires.  To find out more about me check out: What Does Barbara Do? or visit  my website.