Tag Archives: Change and Personal Empowerment

Part 1: Three Divine Remedies for Tests, Sorrows, and Adversities

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I just spent the last few days praying, reflecting, and fasting for guidance.  I was feeling intense sorrow and grief and couldn’t seem to shake it.  I felt drained, like I was at the edge, and it was only the power of God that pulled me back on track.   I’d like to share the three divine remedies that helped me,  the first spiritual gem on joy and sorrow comes from the Baha’i Writings and reminds us of the critical importance of being joyful.  When we are sad, we are weaker, are less able to find our calling, and less able to cope and to find the answers we need to pass our “tests”.  The second two gems discussed in Part 2 are from the Holy Bible.

Joy Gives Us Wings

“In this world we are influenced by two sentiments, Joy and Pain. Joy gives us wings! In times of joy our strength is more vital, our intellect keener, and our understanding less clouded. We seem better able to cope with the world and to find our sphere of usefulness. But when sadness visits us we become weak, our strength leaves us, our comprehension is dim and our intelligence veiled. The actualities of life seem to elude our grasp, the eyes of our spirits fail to discover the sacred mysteries, and we become even as dead beings.

No One Escapes

There is no human being untouched by these two influences; but all the sorrow and the grief that exist come from the world of matter — the spiritual world bestows only the joy!”  A man living with his thoughts in this Kingdom knows perpetual joy. The ills all flesh is heir to do not pass him by, but they only touch the surface of his life, the depths are calm and serene.

The Remedy Is At Our Door

Today, humanity is bowed down with trouble, sorrow and grief, no one escapes; the world is wet with tears; but, thank God, the remedy is at our doors. Let us turn our hearts away from the world of matter and live in the spiritual world! It alone can give us freedom! If we are hemmed in by difficulties we have only to call upon God, and by His great Mercy we shall be helped.

If sorrow and adversity visit us, let us turn our faces to the Kingdom and heavenly consolation will be outpoured. If we are sick and in distress let us implore God’s healing, and He will answer our prayer. (Abdu’l-Baha, Paris Talks, p. 109)  Baha’i Faith

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JOY Cometh in The Morning

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2010 is coming to a close and like a fierce winter making its tenacious exit, ” my 2010 seems to insist on “going out like a lion.”  But, like the natural and eventual seasonal exit of winter, we must not forget that spring is always on the horizon, even it we can’t quite see it yet.  And, all the divine  grace and  seeds we’ve planted are germinating and destined to break forth in the Spring with an abundant harvest.

Believe It and You Will See It

It is faith that reminds us of our own personal spring and it is only faith that will cause our spring to appear.  And when we “believe it, we will see it.”   The birds, the trees, and the plants don’t judge or doubt their winters or their springs!  You see the birds flying south, the squirrels burying their acorns, and the trees willingly and without a fight allowing their leaves and fruits to be stripped from their limbs.  The trees bend with the winds and in due time her blossoms return.  Nature knows it is the order of things.  We must be more like the lesser kingdoms.

Nothing Lasts Forever

Whether you are feeling anger or sadness, you must remember that this too shall pass.  “Life is in our favor” and joy is promised and on the horizon.  I leave you with this verse from Psalms:  “For his anger endureth but a moment; in his favour is life: weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning. ” (King James Bible)

12 Ways to Overcome the FEAR of Entrepreneurship (Part 3)

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This article discusses the final four of twelve in ‘How to Not Be Afraid to Go into Business: Don’t Give Up, Protecting Yourself from Negative People, Hard Work, and Necessity in Excelling in What You Do.

  1. Don’t Give Up:  Just Change with The Times– As I mentioned, I’ve been in business almost 24 years and there have been some very good years and very bad years.  Instead of giving up, I’ve had to re-invent myself over and over through the years and change with the tides.  Your business must be fluid and flexible.  Sometimes I changed my products, sometimes my delivery method, other times, it was my audience.  Although I started off doing computer training, I made several transformations over the decades, to corporate trainer for Diversity, Leadership, and Sexual Harassment, then to Time Management, Goal Setting, and then Effective Communications.  Then I became a motivational speaker and author of six books and counting.  Just ask yourself regularly, “How can I  best serve my audience with my unique talents and abilities?”
  2. Protect Yourself from Naysayers, Negative folks, and Toxic People– One of hardest challenges I had to overcome was convincing those closest to me to stick with me through the hard times.  When money was flowing, things were good, but it when it wasn’t, I faced challenges in the business, my relationships, my finances, and my self-esteem.  You pretty much have to have a “thick skin”, unconditional faith and perseverance, and the ability to keep yourself motivated. That is why I had to carefully choose those who I allowed in my front seats.  Join like-minded associations, get out and network, and partner with others.
  3. Work As Hard for Yourself as You Do for Others– Once you go into business, you have to work as hard for yourself as you did for others.  In fact, you will probably have to work even harder.  When I was an employee, I was only responsible for a few set of tasks.  Once I became self employed, I was responsible for everything, taxes, course development, marketing, delivery of service, billing, self improvement, etc.  Now, one thing I’ve learned that I would do differently is that you must do what you do best and partner with or hire others to do what they do best. I had to become a “Superwoman” to take care of six kids, run a business, and save my sanity.  Now that’s a  topic for another time.
  4. Excel in Your Craft– My motto was to learn something every single day to better myself.  After every course I gave,  I harshly critiqued myself and updated my course materials  before the next time I gave that course again.  I always asked for feedback.  Sometimes it was harsh and hurtful, but I learned from all of  it.  But be careful, don’t focus too long on the negative.   I remember once re-thinking my decision to do Diversity training because one person was so rude, critical,  and cruel.  But instead, I focused on the hundreds of people who loved the course, and were changed by and appreciative of it.  Just do your best and keep listening and improving.  For most of my entrepreneurial career I survived on referrals.  I always tried to do more than was expected, be professional, and keep improving.  If you do that, you’ll excel, your customers will be happy and you will be in business for years.

I’m Barbara Talley, The Poet who speaks and inspires.   To find more about me, check out my promo sheet or visit  my website.

12 Ways to Overcome the FEAR of Entrepreneurship (Part 2)

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Part two of ‘How to Not Be Afraid to Go Into Business‘ discusses the next four considerations:  Faith, Relationships, Benefits, Learning from Mistakes.

  1. Faith Will Get You Through– I had to focus on the benefits of being in business not the challenges of being in business.  I had to believe in and focus on the my goal.  The challenges will come anyway in time, so deal with them then.  To focus on the problems in  advance is called “worry” and is a waste of your precious and limited time. Armed with only a vision, a dream, and the support of my husband, I went into business.  I had been working for years doing computer training and getting contracts for other firms.  I had to have faith that it was possible to do the same for myself.  But the first and most important person I had to convince was myself.  I had to believe in myself and my abilities.  I had to make a decision and put all my faith and energy behind it through action.
  2. Hang Around People Who Are Business Minded– If you ask someone who is not in business for encouragement, you may not get the support you need.  Ask someone who is already in business for encouragement, advice, and guidance.   Would you ask someone who has never traveled if you should travel?  Would you ask someone who has never had children if you should have them or how to raise them?  Would you ask someone who dropped out of school if you should get a higher education and how to go about it?  I think I’ve made my point.  Associate with people who have been where you want to go or who are currently going in the same direction you are.
  3. Must Have Something of Benefit to Offer Others- It’s easier to go into business if you are convinced you have something of benefit to offer others.  Learn about the unique benefits you have to offer and then “share” those benefits with your potential customers.  Don’t focus so much on the money or selling, but instead on the service.  Most people fear “selling” their wares, but it is not selling if people need it.  You are servicing people when you offer them what they need at a fair price and with superior quality.  In fact, the Baha’i Faith describes this as “worship”, any service performed in the spirit of service and done to excellence.
  4. Learn from Your Mistakes–  Just stay in the mood of learning.  Of course you will make mistakes, but that’s part of growing.  The tree most pruned bears the best fruit, right?   Just don’t give up.  In fact, it isn’t a mistake if you learn something.  Every challenge you overcome builds more confidence.

I’m Barbara Talley, The Poet who speaks and inspires.   To find more about me, check out my promo sheet or visit  my website.

12 Ways to Overcome the FEAR of Entrepreneurship (Part 1)

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Today I was asked by Mark  S. on Facebook, “How did you do it, Barb?”  This was referring to how to not be afraid to start a business.  I started to respond, with an instant answer, something like “just have faith,” but decided to instead reflect on it a bit.  In 2011, I will celebrate 24 years of being in business.  In this series I share twelve  tips on how to not be afraid to go into business.  The first four are: Facing Fear, Having A Compelling Why?, Opportunity, and Timing.

  1. To Fear or Not to Fear Is Not the Deciding Factor:  I started my business in 1987 and I can’t honestly say that I was not afraid back then for I’m sure that I was.   But, what I can say is, if you are afraid, DO IT ANYWAY! You will be afraid sometimes; that’s life.  The only way to overcome fear is to face it. If you allow all of those negative “What If” questions to take hold, you’ll never go into business.    Sometimes that fear is cathartic, other times it’s cancerous.  If it points out essential knowledge, skills, and resources you need, acknowledge it and then figure out how to get what you need.Our decisions are either FEAR-based or FAITH-based, one excites you the other paralyzes you.  But in the end, fear is only a thought.  And, you have to consciously focus on that thought in order for it to derail you.  So don’t focus on what you fear!  If you want to start a business, you have a lot to be thinking about, the name, the business structure, the product, the team, the marketing (benefits), the money, the audience, the delivery method etc.  Once you decide you have something viable to offer, focus on that and you’ll have very little time left over to just worry.
  2. Must Have A Compelling Why?– You must start by asking yourself the question, “Why do I want to go into business?” The answer to that question must be compelling enough to carry you through the fear, the doubt, the naysayers, the frustration, and the despair that you will probably experience at some time.  My “WHY” was that I wanted to work at home, to be able to guide and protect my kids.  My older son had gotten into drugs in high school even though my husband and I came home every day from work and was with him.  We didn’t understand or notice the subtle changes of a teen, and being our first teen, shrugged it off as just “teenage puberty.”  At that time, I had another teen son, and after the birth of my first daughter I made a goal to figure out a way to work from home. I didn’t know how I was going to do it at that time.  In retrospect, none of that really mattered anyway.  The universe takes care of ‘how’ for committed faithful people.    I just had to DECIDE to do it and set a goal.  If you’ve got something that the world needs, share it! My compelling ‘WHY’ was to save my kids and I didn’t want them to be latch-key kids.  My “WHY” kept me going through the fear.
  3. Seize the Opportunity and Just Do It!= There will never be a perfect time to go into business.  Although I had set a 6-year goal to go into business, I actually accomplished it within a couple of years.  I had to decide to do it and then start doing it. I’d like to say I had a great plan, but I didn’t at first.  Some read a book about how to drive and then drive.  Others, like myself watch other people and then just do it.  I learned how to be in business by “just jumping in.  It was “sink or swim,” so I learned how to swim.  Now if you’ve got the option to dip your feet in the water, by all means, do that if that will ease your fear.  Now, I’ve found that only serious wholehearted and unlimited faith, hard work, and tenacity will keep you going, but first you’ve got to get going.
  4. Don’t Wait for the Perfect Time– There never will be a perfect time.  And, it was not the perfect time for me either.  I was 7 months pregnant, laid off from my job, had a teen on drugs,  had no money to start a business, and within a couple of months I would be giving birth to my 5th child.  But, I didn’t allow excuses into the equation;  I focused on my ‘WHY.”  I had to act like I was in business.  So I started telling folks, setting up my office, and preparing myself.  Word, got around and I got some business and was “in business.

I’m Barbara Talley, The Poet who speaks and inspires.   To find more about me, check out my promo sheet or visit  my website.