Tag Archives: Faith

12 Ways to Overcome the FEAR of Entrepreneurship (Part 2)

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Part two of ‘How to Not Be Afraid to Go Into Business‘ discusses the next four considerations:  Faith, Relationships, Benefits, Learning from Mistakes.

  1. Faith Will Get You Through– I had to focus on the benefits of being in business not the challenges of being in business.  I had to believe in and focus on the my goal.  The challenges will come anyway in time, so deal with them then.  To focus on the problems in  advance is called “worry” and is a waste of your precious and limited time. Armed with only a vision, a dream, and the support of my husband, I went into business.  I had been working for years doing computer training and getting contracts for other firms.  I had to have faith that it was possible to do the same for myself.  But the first and most important person I had to convince was myself.  I had to believe in myself and my abilities.  I had to make a decision and put all my faith and energy behind it through action.
  2. Hang Around People Who Are Business Minded– If you ask someone who is not in business for encouragement, you may not get the support you need.  Ask someone who is already in business for encouragement, advice, and guidance.   Would you ask someone who has never traveled if you should travel?  Would you ask someone who has never had children if you should have them or how to raise them?  Would you ask someone who dropped out of school if you should get a higher education and how to go about it?  I think I’ve made my point.  Associate with people who have been where you want to go or who are currently going in the same direction you are.
  3. Must Have Something of Benefit to Offer Others- It’s easier to go into business if you are convinced you have something of benefit to offer others.  Learn about the unique benefits you have to offer and then “share” those benefits with your potential customers.  Don’t focus so much on the money or selling, but instead on the service.  Most people fear “selling” their wares, but it is not selling if people need it.  You are servicing people when you offer them what they need at a fair price and with superior quality.  In fact, the Baha’i Faith describes this as “worship”, any service performed in the spirit of service and done to excellence.
  4. Learn from Your Mistakes–  Just stay in the mood of learning.  Of course you will make mistakes, but that’s part of growing.  The tree most pruned bears the best fruit, right?   Just don’t give up.  In fact, it isn’t a mistake if you learn something.  Every challenge you overcome builds more confidence.

I’m Barbara Talley, The Poet who speaks and inspires.   To find more about me, check out my promo sheet or visit  my website.

12 Ways to Overcome the FEAR of Entrepreneurship (Part 1)

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Today I was asked by Mark  S. on Facebook, “How did you do it, Barb?”  This was referring to how to not be afraid to start a business.  I started to respond, with an instant answer, something like “just have faith,” but decided to instead reflect on it a bit.  In 2011, I will celebrate 24 years of being in business.  In this series I share twelve  tips on how to not be afraid to go into business.  The first four are: Facing Fear, Having A Compelling Why?, Opportunity, and Timing.

  1. To Fear or Not to Fear Is Not the Deciding Factor:  I started my business in 1987 and I can’t honestly say that I was not afraid back then for I’m sure that I was.   But, what I can say is, if you are afraid, DO IT ANYWAY! You will be afraid sometimes; that’s life.  The only way to overcome fear is to face it. If you allow all of those negative “What If” questions to take hold, you’ll never go into business.    Sometimes that fear is cathartic, other times it’s cancerous.  If it points out essential knowledge, skills, and resources you need, acknowledge it and then figure out how to get what you need.Our decisions are either FEAR-based or FAITH-based, one excites you the other paralyzes you.  But in the end, fear is only a thought.  And, you have to consciously focus on that thought in order for it to derail you.  So don’t focus on what you fear!  If you want to start a business, you have a lot to be thinking about, the name, the business structure, the product, the team, the marketing (benefits), the money, the audience, the delivery method etc.  Once you decide you have something viable to offer, focus on that and you’ll have very little time left over to just worry.
  2. Must Have A Compelling Why?– You must start by asking yourself the question, “Why do I want to go into business?” The answer to that question must be compelling enough to carry you through the fear, the doubt, the naysayers, the frustration, and the despair that you will probably experience at some time.  My “WHY” was that I wanted to work at home, to be able to guide and protect my kids.  My older son had gotten into drugs in high school even though my husband and I came home every day from work and was with him.  We didn’t understand or notice the subtle changes of a teen, and being our first teen, shrugged it off as just “teenage puberty.”  At that time, I had another teen son, and after the birth of my first daughter I made a goal to figure out a way to work from home. I didn’t know how I was going to do it at that time.  In retrospect, none of that really mattered anyway.  The universe takes care of ‘how’ for committed faithful people.    I just had to DECIDE to do it and set a goal.  If you’ve got something that the world needs, share it! My compelling ‘WHY’ was to save my kids and I didn’t want them to be latch-key kids.  My “WHY” kept me going through the fear.
  3. Seize the Opportunity and Just Do It!= There will never be a perfect time to go into business.  Although I had set a 6-year goal to go into business, I actually accomplished it within a couple of years.  I had to decide to do it and then start doing it. I’d like to say I had a great plan, but I didn’t at first.  Some read a book about how to drive and then drive.  Others, like myself watch other people and then just do it.  I learned how to be in business by “just jumping in.  It was “sink or swim,” so I learned how to swim.  Now if you’ve got the option to dip your feet in the water, by all means, do that if that will ease your fear.  Now, I’ve found that only serious wholehearted and unlimited faith, hard work, and tenacity will keep you going, but first you’ve got to get going.
  4. Don’t Wait for the Perfect Time– There never will be a perfect time.  And, it was not the perfect time for me either.  I was 7 months pregnant, laid off from my job, had a teen on drugs,  had no money to start a business, and within a couple of months I would be giving birth to my 5th child.  But, I didn’t allow excuses into the equation;  I focused on my ‘WHY.”  I had to act like I was in business.  So I started telling folks, setting up my office, and preparing myself.  Word, got around and I got some business and was “in business.

I’m Barbara Talley, The Poet who speaks and inspires.   To find more about me, check out my promo sheet or visit  my website.

7 Lessons from Four Funerals

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In this season of Thanksgiving and gift giving, when tensions are high and budgets are strained, and food, family, and shopping are on everyone’s mind, I’d like to offer a new perspective for the season, and ultimately for life. Attending four funerals in less than three months teaches you a thing or two about life, if you’re alert and listening.  Let’s learn from those who we have transitioned to the other side and not get side-tracked from what really matters in this fleeting earthly life.  Seven lessons follow:

  1. Spend time with people in ways that bring them joy and happiness. It is a less expensive and ultimately a more lasting gift.
  2. Give those you care about flowers while they can still see and smell them. Flowers don’t have to be physical flowers either.  Give your heart, your love, your time, your attention, your encouragement, and your kindness.
  3. Don’t say things that you may later regret. You’re familiar with the old adage, “If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything.” There is some good in every single person.  Make it a priority to find that goodness and focus only on it.
  4. Reach out to family and friends. Pick up the phone, write, or visit people.  When you think about them, make an effort to connect with them.  Do what you can to bring your own family closer and let people know how much you care about them.  My son Shawn says that Lil Larry was our family’s Facebook before the internet facebook.  He kept in touch with everyone.
  5. Forgive each other and unite. Create rituals that keep the family unit connected. Ms. Frances called her sisters and children every day just to see how they were and to tell them she loved them.
  6. Say kind words while others can still hear them. At the funeral of Frances Coley, several people commented that they had NEVER heard her say an unkind word about anyone.  Can you say this?    It’s admirable to speak kindly of the dead, but it’s even more meaningful to say nice things of the living.  To be able to speak at all is a divine gift that only we humans have.  So use your words responsibly for they are powerful.
  7. Really care about other people. Be gentle with them and really listen to them.  Jacquelyn Lefton was one of those people who seemed to see your very soul when you were in her presence.  She always spoke softly and gently and looked you right in the eyes and nodded with each word.  You felt like she really heard you and that she fully understood what you were saying.  But more than this, you left her presence feeling like she really cared about you.  Remember, “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care!”

And finally, remember you can’t attach a U-Haul to a Hearse.  All you take with you and all you leave with others is confined to the heart.

I’m Barbara Talley, The Poet who speaks and inspires.   To find more about me, visit:  www.thepoetspeaks.com

Give Thanks for the People in Your Life

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Thanksgiving 2010, the Talley family had a different kind of celebration.  Instead of food being the focus, our thoughts were on giving thanks for the people still in our lives and for the life of a very special nephew, Larry Daniel Talley. Lil Larry was killed after being thrown from a motorcycle just a few blocks from his home.  The graphic tribute below was created by his loving niece Indiah.

Ironically, he was taking a final spin before selling his bike that afternoon, but tragically it turned out to be his “final spin.”  And, at the age of 33, he was laid to rest on Friday, November 26, 2010, surrounded by an outpouring of love rarely experienced while one is still alive.

Make Everyone Feel Special

How was he able to attract over 600 people (some say almost 1000 with those who came and left) from around the country to his funeral in less than five days?  I think, probably because everyone who knew him felt his love for them.  He made everyone he knew feel special.  When you were around him, you knew you mattered to him. We affectionately called him ‘Lil Larry,’ but there was nothing little about him, he always had “big tales to tell, a big smile, a big laugh, and an even bigger heart.   He took the time to regularly connect with everyone, family, friends, and strangers alike.  Nothing was more important to him than family, he loved his family, and we knew it.

Don’t Wait to Show You Care

Why do we wait to let people know how much they mean to us until it is too late?  In the funeral service held for Mrs. Frances Barnes two months prior, the choir sang a song that left a lasting impression on me.  The lyrics, “Give me flowers while I can still see them; say kind words to me while I can still hear them,” still ring in my ears because of their profundity.  I learned similarly profound lessons from the lives or deaths of  Lil Larry, Mrs. Frances Coley, and Mrs. Jacquelyn Lefton.  Reflecting on ‘what we remember’ when a loved one passes on offers important lessons for this life and how we should live.  What will people remember about you?  [View a video tribute of  my nephew Lil Larry’s  life]

I’m Barbara Talley, The Poet who speaks and inspires.   To find more about me, visit:  www.thepoetspeaks.com

You Can’t Attach a U-Haul to a Hearse

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I spent the day after Thanksgiving burying a loved one.  During the past three months, I have attended four funerals and four times I have been “forced” or “privileged” to look at the eventual finality of this earthly sojourn and to put this whole human experience into perspective.  Interestingly, there has been at least one preeminent and recurring lesson through them all: in the end, all that there is, all that matters, is love! [Note: Thing 1(Laylah)- in the picture below is the three-year-old daughter of my nephew who died last week,  Thing 2-(French Pope IV is my grandson.]

How Many Lives Do You Touch?

Love is the glue that connects hearts in this life and in the next.  In the end, no one cares how much money you had or didn’t have, what degrees you had or did not have, what jobs you lost or found, where you lived, what you wore, or what you drove, none of that really matters.  No one cares how much “stuff” you have; because in the end, no one attaches a U-Haul to a hearse.  Love is all that you take with you.  The one with the biggest heart wins!  And, in the end life asks a different set of questions: “How many lives did you touch?” How much love did you give?  How much did you care?  And more importantly, how successful were you in letting people know how much you cared about them?

Don’t Wait to Show You Care

Why do we wait to let people know how much they mean to us until it is too late?  In the funeral service held for Mrs. Frances Barnes two months prior, the choir sang a song that left a lasting impression on me.  The lyrics, “Give me flowers while I can still see them; say kind words to me while I can still hear them,” still ring in my ears because of their profundity.  I learned similarly profound lessons from the lives or deaths of  Lil Larry, Mrs. Frances Coley, and Mrs. Jacquelyn Lefton.  Reflecting on ‘what we remember’ when a loved one passes on offers important lessons for this life and how we should live.  We don’t control our entrants or exits, or when we take our first and last breath. So it would behoove us to get our houses in order.   What will people remember about you?  What will you take with you?

I’m Barbara Talley, The Poet who speaks and inspires.   To find more about me, visit:  www.thepoetspeaks.com