Tag Archives: self-help

Dream Derailer #6a: Not Committed Enough

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Okay, you’ve got a dream, the desire, and you also feel that you have the talent, but you’re not making the progress you desire.  So, now what? Why do some still fail to produce the outcome they desire or see their dreams come true?

Wanting Is Not Enough

Most people think that wanting something badly enough will make it happen.  If that were true we’d have world peace, no poverty, and war would be no more, for people profess to want these things.  I agree, wanting is an important first step, but desire is not enough, you have to be committed.  Mary Crowley, the founder of Home Interiors, a highly successful multi-level marketing decorating business, once made a profound statement about commitment.  She said something to the effect, “I’ll take one committed person any day over ten ‘interested’ people.”

Are You Committed or Just Interested?

Who would you support, believe in, trust, and collaborate with, the interested person or the committed person? Pause now and take a look at your current goals.  Decide for each goal if you are committed or simply interested and be honest with yourself.  Then either commit or let the goal go until such time when you can fully commit.  Why frustrate yourself and dissipate your energy?  Instead focus your energy on the goals you are committed to and watch magic happen!  Continue to part two to read about the Five  Signs of Commitment.

I’m Barbara Talley, the poet who speaks and inspires.  To find out more about me check out: What Does Barbara Do? or visit  my website.

Don’t give your power away and don’t give up on yourself.

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Choose to Be Around People Who Lift You Up

Unfortunately far too many people give up their dreams because of the negative people in their lives.  You must understand that your dream, your goal, and your vision is your unique treasure.  Others may not necessarily see it or believe it to be possible.  That is why you must never succumb to negativity.  That is why you must know yourself and know your strengths and your weaknesses. I know it’s disheartening to sometimes not have those you care about most believe in you.  But you matter too.  Believing in yourself is the catalyst for others believing in you.  In fact why should anyone believe in you if you don’t even believe in yourself, especially since you should know yourself better than anyone else knows you.

DON'T GIVE UP

DON’T GIVE UP

Everyone Has Their Moments

Everyone will have moments from time to time that their dreams seem elusive, fleeting, and perhaps even impossible.  It is precisely at these times that we need to have more faith.  So make sure you hang around those who will inspire, encourage, and lift you up.  Choose your own words carefully too, because words become reality.  Say only that which you want to become your reality.  And finally, understand that the environment shapes us.  Look around you.  Do the people, the conversations, or the surroundings reflect who you are or what you aspire to be?  I remember a point in my life where the people, their conversations and even the environment were discouraging, uninspiring, and depressing.  I did not fit and I knew it.  I made the changes necessary so that my vision of who I was became congruent with my friends and environment.  It was only then that I began to soar!

I’m Barbara Talley, the poet who speaks and inspires.  To find out more about me check out: What Does Barbara Do? or visit  my website.

Dream Derailer #5- Succumbing to Negativity

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My dad used to always say, “Smile and the world will smile with you.”  A surefire way of getting off track with your dreams is to succumb to the negative people, beliefs, attitudes, and perspectives of those you come in contact with.  When we allow the negativity to take hold, we relinquish our power.

How do you see the world?

Remember the computer acronym, WYSIWYG (what you see is what you get).  Meaning, what you choose to see greatly influences your outcome.  Your power is in your perception and perspective.  If you believe you will succeed, you will!  If you see the glass as half full, it’s half full.  If you see it as half empty, that version can also become your reality.  The point is that you have free will and how you choose to see a situation paints your reality.  If you see the world as an unjust, hateful, unforgiving, and cruel place, that  will be your reality.  If you see the universe as abundant, beautiful, and loving, that perspective will color your world.  It is what you decide it is.

Negativity Comes in Many Forms

Negativity comes in all forms and all of them are dangerous.  Whether it is your thoughts, the people you choose to be in your inner circle, what you read, listen to, or watch, or just the physical environments around you, it all affects you.  There are inspiring people, uplifting thoughts, and nurturing environments just as there are negative thoughts, toxic people, and discouraging environments.  The point is, in order to stay on track and keep moving towards your dreams (in spite of all the obstacles), you’ve got to have the right attitude.  Our attitudes and outcomes are affected by the people we hang around with and the environments we choose to be influenced by, so choose them carefully.  We know how hard it is on us when others give up on us, so above all, don’t give up on yourself.

I’m Barbara Talley, the poet who speaks and inspires.  To find out more about me check out: What Does Barbara Do? or visit  my website.

Ten Tips for Tackling Procrastination Tendencies (pt 2)

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Why is it that you can’t get everything done? Is it because time just seems to fly, or you’ve set unreasonable goals,  or are you just not good at managing your time?  Did you know that there is a procrastination equation?  Piers Steel, PhD, one of the world’s foremost researchers and speakers on the science of motivation and procrastination writes, “There are two ways to find out where you land in the ranks of procrastination. Are you a garden-variety dilly dallier or are you hardcore with “tomorrow” tattooed across your back?” Take his survey and get specific information on how much of a procrastinator you are and what you can do about it.

My final five tips for tackling your procrastination tendencies are below.  If you missed first five tips be sure to check them out too.

My Final Five Tips for Tackling Procrastination Tendencies

  1. Make the goal a priority. If it’s not a priority and not as important as other things, stop beating yourself up.  Take it off your list and discard or delay until it is the highest priority.  If it is a priority, be disciplined at putting it first and putting off those things that are not as important to your success.  It’s also a good idea to start working on that plan when you are most alert and productive.  Why sabotage your goal by trying to jump-start it when you are deflated yourself.
  2. Know what your next step is. Sometimes looking at all we have to do is overwhelming.  So you might want to just identify the next step.  From that step you’ll more easily see the next step and so on and so on.  Commit to just doing the next step when the whole project overwhelms you.  Once you get started it’s easier to keep going.
  3. Get Yourself an Accountability Partner. Some people just aren’t self-motivated and need a progress partner. If  you need a muse, mentor, or friend to encourage you, hold you accountable, or to guide, get one or get all three.
  4. Specify a regular time to work on your goal and make it a habit. Habits only happen with regularity and action.  Do something regarding your goal every day, even if it is just to remind yourself of its importance and the time you’ve scheduled to act on it.  For example, I set a goal to pray at midnight.  I’ve found that if I do the same thing every single day around the same time, it becomes habit.  Once working on your goal becomes a habit, then it’s only a matter of time before you finish.
  5. Be clear about how procrastination is affecting you. Have you lost opportunities because you procrastinated?  Have you lost money and had to pay more or fees or jeopardized your credit because you waited until the last minute?  What about your relationships.  Has your chronic lateness caused problems with those you care about?  If you said yes to most of these questions,  your procrastination causing you stress and is a problem.  Your response to any problem should be….do something about it!

“In scientific terms, a person’s intention alone is not enough to see anything through–a condition called “preference reversal.” That means that unless an individual has some knowledge of his or her motivational weaknesses and can create a plan to counteract them, those promises of losing weight or writing a novel will fall to the wayside, Steel said.”  Steele came up with a mathematical formula to overcome procrastination.   Read more: http://news.cnet.com/2100-1008_3-6149636.html#ixzz1ECAsoP9T

I’m Barbara Talley, the poet who speaks and inspires.  To find out more about me check out: What Does Barbara Do? or visit  my website.

Dream Derailer #2b: Ignoring the Body’s Real Needs

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If we don’t drink water, we die.

Have you ever  said, “Thank You,” to your water?   Masuru Emoto in his books on the ‘Hidden Messages in Water’ teaches that water is alive, has memory, and consciousness.   His research shows that just having an intention infused into the water changes it cellular pattern which he has captured in pictures.  If water is so significant to life, doesn’t it make logical sense that the quality of the water would be significant too?

Gabrielle Cousens also affirms the significance of consuming good quality water in his discussion of water as a carrier of historical information.  He explains that “structured water” can have up to a million cellular layers.  He states that not all water is good and that good quality waters energizes its host but bad water can cause its demise.   F. Batmanghelidj in his book, ‘You’re Not Sick, You’re Thirsty’, states, “The human body is a composite structure made of many different systems. All these systems are dependent on the various properties of water for their normal function.  When there is not enough water in the body for all the functions to take place, something has to give.”

Don’t Become Slaves to Pain and Pills

Conscious eating, drinking, and breathing are just as important as consciously pursuing career, educational, financial, security, and relationship goals.  You can’t continually put your health on hold without serious consequences.  And, wouldn’t logical, responsible, or health seeking people want to take care of the systems that take care of them?   Two days ago I attended an event where a national journalist in her early thirties shared how she had climbed the ladder of success, finally realized her dream, and had a heart attack.  She was young, beautiful, talented, and successful and yet according to the paramedics on the scene, she was just ten minutes away from losing it all!  Too many people are becoming lifetime slaves to pills and pain because of health conditions brought on by their own neglect.  What good is it to gain all the resources one needs to live on top of the mountain contentedly and not have the energy to climb up and enjoy the view?    If you are to manifest your dreams, you have to be here to do it.  You have to be alive.  You have to have energy.

I’m Barbara Talley, the poet who speaks and inspires.  To find out more about me check out: What Does Barbara Do? or visit  my website.