Why do you think our wisest teachers have taught us, “If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything?”

Before you answer, think about the people you trust, admire, and respect the most.  Are their words nice and sweet like honey or caustic and bitter like acid?  All humans have a natural intrinsic need to connect, to be liked, to be accepted, and more importantly, to be needed and valued.  One of the quickest ways to make that connection is by using nice (kind, pleasant, and polite) words in our speech.

It is through our words that we connect or divide and it is that connectedness that makes us truly human and attractive.

The question each of us must answer is, “Are we more likely to get our needs met being nasty or nice?” Our humanity is demonstrated through our compassion, sympathy, and kindness to one another, for there is an emotional component attached to our words which is communicated non-verbally.  One of the most powerful gifts that a human being possesses is speech. Each syllable and sound is infused with potential meaning and influence.  That is why we must always choose our words so carefully.  Unless we are being disingenuous, our emotions will also match our words and vice versa.  Nice people tend to say nice things; nasty people are likely to say nasty things.  You can’t completely separate who you really are from what comes out of your mouth.

I’m Barbara Talley, the poet who speaks and inspires.  To find out more about me check out: What Does Barbara Do? or visit  my website.