Category Archives: Appreciating Life

Change Is Part of The Master Plan

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It is December, the time of holiday spirits, year-end reflections, and the anticipation or regret of the approaching winter weather. If there is one thing that I know for sure, it is that things WILL change.  All you have to do is open your eyes to see change all around you.  There is new construction where once there were trees or abandoned property. Houses once filled with familiar voices and laughter are now empty or new occupants have staked their claims. The trees which once were spectacularly clothed by nature now stand naked and barren, while simple houses are lit and dressed in their best holiday finery.  Even relationships that we had last year have perhaps changed, some for the better, others for the worse.  And if we are fortunate, we too will  have changed! Remember, it’s not the strongest or wisest that survive, but the one most adaptable to change.

“The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man.” -George Bernard Shaw

“Someone was hurt before you, wronged before you, hungry before you, frightened before you, beaten before you, humiliated before you, raped before you… yet, someone survived… You can do anything you choose to do.” –Maya Angelou

Change is part of the master plan and is inevitable.    Life will happen, with or without our permission, engagement, or opinion. Our only choice is to decide whether we will grow from the change or not AND whether we will drive the change or let it drive us.  You  can fight it, shape it, or embrace it.  So, why not decide to grow, to improve, to be happier, to be financially secure, to become smarter, to become more virtuous and loving, and to make your mark and make a difference.

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Expectations Impact Results

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It doesn’t cost any more to dream a big powerful dream than it does to dream a small insignificant one. I perceived last year as challenging and it was extremely challenging.  I decided that this year would be better and it most definitely was.  I got to go to LA for a screen test, joined the Capital Speakers Club, got many new clients, published a new book, was nominated for Mother of the Year, and still made time for myself and the people in my life.  Get the connection?  Expectations impact results.  So, knowing how the universe works, next year I am claiming and expecting the best year of my life.   What about you?  Do you dare dream a bigger dream or are you so paralyzed by the collective fears of the nation that you feel that dreaming big is futile?

“We tend to live up to our expectations.”  Earl Nightingale

“We must learn to reawaken and keep ourselves awake, not by mechanical aid, but by an infinite expectation of the dawn.”  Henry David Thoreau

Check out my previous article on the power of expectations and emotions for more on the power of expectations.

I’m Barbara Talley, the poet who speaks and inspires.  To find out more about me check out: What Does Barbara Do? or visit  my website.

Audio Testimonials of Satisfied Clients
Video in New Orleans- Candid audience testimonials

First- Protect The Children

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What I learned at last month’s Congressional Black Caucus’s Braintrusts and Issue Forums:

Everyone deserves a quality education, but a quality early childhood education is not available to all children.  Clearly the odds are not in favor for poor children.  Budgets are being cut despite  the decades of research affirming without a doubt that early childhood educational programs like Head-start can give at-risk children the chance the succeed.

Other Daunting Facts:

Ten thousand black and brown children are imprisoned every day.  “The annual cost of detention can average around $50,000 per minor while most community-based programs cost less than one-fourth that amount.”  “Research shows that incarcerating youth does not make us safer—in fact, it undermines public safety. Detention often propels a youth in a direction that leads to behaviors responsible for the recidivism rates of 50% to 80% for incarcerated youth. ”

The Rebecca Project states: “There are now between 100,000 and 300,000 adolescents in the American sex trade market, most between 12 and 14.” We continue to punish those who have already been punished by society.

A flyer distributed by the Campaign for the Fair Sentencing of Youth: Racial Inequality in Youth Sentencing‘ and their website offered these facts:

  1. “In schools, youth of color are more likely to be expelled or suspended, but there is no evidence that they misbehave more than their white counterparts.”
  2. “They are, however, punished more severely, often for behaviors that are less serious.”
  3.  “45% of all incarcerated youth are African American even though they only make up 17% of the population.”
  4. “The United States is the only country in the world where a person under the age of 18 can be sentenced to a life without parole. “
  5.  “Youth crime rates have dropped steadily since the 1990s, yet rates of incarcerating youth have increased.
  6. “According to the Coalition for Juvenile Justice, the number of youth held in pre-trial detention has increased 72% since the early 1990s.”
  7. “African American youth are 10 times more likely than their white peers to be sentenced to life in prison without the possibility of parole.  This is just one example of disparities in sentencing: a 2001 Journal of Law and Economics empirical study of sentencing in federal courts found that, on average, African Americans of all ages are given sentences twice as long as whites.”

Congressman Scott representing Virginia’s 3rd District has introduced the Youth Promise Act as a solution.  I’ll discuss his and other successful projects you can support in an upcoming post.

Honor Your Sight and Insight

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When you can’t see, it makes you realize how important sight is.  I probably wouldn’t have even been thinking about my sight this morning had I not misplaced my glasses.  Now I am thinking how grateful I am to be able to see (even if I need glasses for reading.)  Sight is such a wonderful gift.  I’m now thinking about how many other wonderful things are before me that I’ve taken for granted and not expressly been thankful for.

Fortunately I located my glasses before long, but the lesson was still strikingly clear.

Sight is an extremely gift.

We must honor it,  protect it, appreciate it, and make use of it. It is through sight that we learn new things, acknowledge what is before us, and connect with our world.  And while sight is critical, insight is just as important.  We must learn to connect with those things that physical sight can not see.  Insight is being able to envision things, that is, to imagine, dream, and create new realities.  Each of us has marvelous powers that can not only transform our individual worlds, but also has the power to change and recreate the world around us.  Both our physical sight and insight require our focused attention and dramatically affect the quality of our lives.  We have to take the time to focus our sight because where our sight goes, our thoughts go.  Where our thoughts go, our attention, emotions, and energy goes.  And our emotional state and where we focus of our attention and energy determines what manifests in our lives.   We’ve got to take the time to see, reflect, imagine, and create the life of our dreams.  You have the power, use it!  Remember sight is a gift, honor it!

Be Thankful for Your Sight

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This morning when I awoke as my brain was transitioning to the theta brain wave state, I starting thinking about all the things I had to be grateful for.  First of all I was grateful that I had a morning that I could just sleep in late, with no deadlines and stresses on the immediate horizon.  I thanked God for my family, my home, my children, and so on.  I thought about my step-mom who had recently passed and thanked God for her 85 years. I offered thanks for my recent work opportunities and for the people in my  life, like Gina Watkins of Constant Contact.  She had invited me to be her guest at a wonderful gala put on by SCORE, Service Core of Retired Executives.

The more I thanked, the more I remembered to be thankful for.

I decided to read some spiritual text but realized that I couldn’t find my glasses.  I can see pretty well, but some things are blurry, like text in a book or  the numbers on a phone.  Then I realized something else to be thankful for, my sight.  I looked at all the books I’d recently purchased at the Borders ‘Going Out of Business’ sale and realized that without sight, I couldn’t access this new oasis of knowledge.  After each blurry encounter while looking for my glasses, I was powerfully reminded of how important sight is.  I thought about how my day would go if I didn’t find my glasses.  It would be very different from the relaxed one I had planned.  Life presents us lessons all the time and by different methods.  My glasses just happened to be the medium of my lesson this morning.  So instead of being frustrated about not finding my glasses, I decided to just appreciate the sight I had and to be grateful for all the other senses I had. Why is it that we have to lose something before we really appreciate it?  So, think about what lesson life is presenting you today and appreciate the medium that gives you the opportunity to grow!

I’m Barbara Talley, the poet who speaks and inspires.  To find out more about me check out: What Does Barbara Do? or visit  my website.