21 Ways to Make Your Home a Fortress for Well-Being

21 Ways to Make Your Home Happier

21 Ways to Make Your Home Happier

You’ve heard it said before, “Home is where the heart is.

But the home is so much more. Home should be where your heart, healing, happiness, and humanity are best magnified. If you don’t show or won’t show humanity, forgiveness, kindness, and encouragement at home, then where?  Your home is your loving lab, where you can make mistakes in a loving environment and grow from them. Your home is the place where you GROW your family and pass on your values.  It gets frustrating worrying about all the bad things in the world and feeling hopeless, so focus your energy on the one place where you can make a difference.  Your home is your first responsibility.  Make it more loving, healing, encouraging, and trusting.

Home is a safe place to dream and expect encouragement and support.  We are truly in a sad state of affairs if our homes do not restore us to wholeness. Even worse, when our homes are the cause of our sorrow, depression, fear, and self-devaluing. Your home must become your fortress for well-being, the place you go to heal, restore, and flourish.  It should be the one place where you can let your guard down and be able to trust. It should be the one place where you will have the most influence. What you DO in your home affects its power to heal.  These are 21 Things we do to make our house a home.

  1. We do second chances, and sometimes third, fourth, fifth, sixth…….infinity
  2. We do grace.
  3. We do real.
  4. We do trust.
  5. We do loud; Sometimes, we do real loud!
  6. We do encouragement.
  7. We do mistakes.
  8. We do, “I’m sorry.”
  9. We do hugs.
  10. We do, “I love you.”
  11. We do prayer.
  12. We do faith.
  13. We do forgiveness.
  14. We do gratitude.
  15. We do service.
  16. We do laughter and lots of it!
  17. We do, “Please!”
  18. We do, “Thank You!”
  19. We do “Excuse Me!”
  20. We do, “Let me help you!
  21. We do, “Let go and Let God!  (a whole lot)

I’m Barbara Talley,  The Poet who speaks and inspires.   To find more about me, check out my promo sheet or visit  my website.

Moving Forward Means Letting Go

“Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars. You have to let go at some point in order to move forward.” -C.S. Lewis   

Whether your current moment is merry or miserable, you must let go of it if you are to move on to the next.   The miserable moments are only miserable when we label them that way. The merry moments are only that way because we decided that they were merry.  This morning I was reflecting on last December and the changes that have occurred since last year this time.  There have been so many.  For one, there were people in my life last year that are gone this year.  Two years ago at this time, we were mourning my nephew’s tragic and untimely demise at age 32.  Everyone was wishing that they’d spent more time with him or that they had said and done things to let him know how much he was loved while he was there.  Last year it is my step-mother who passed in July. She lived to be 85-years old.  This morning I was reflecting on how she did not spend the holidays with us that last year before she passed.  There were many reasons, but mainly our collective somber mood and the weather.  Little did I know that we would not have another opportunity.

“It’s not life’s big planned events that make the big difference, it is the simple, intimate, and sometimes spontaneous things we do for each other.” Barbara Talley

While there has been significant losses, at the same time there has been significant gain.  I am not the same person I was last year or the year before. I’ve been tested by trials and as they say, “The tree most pruned bears the best fruit.”  Last year this time there was a fear and hopelessness that has now been replaced by faith and expectation.  I have new relationships, new opportunities, and a new sense of valuing life’s little moments.  I am better, mainly because I chose to be better.  I know from my more than a half century of living that we must seize every moment.  We don’t love, laugh, and enrich the world in the past or the present, we do it ONLY in the current moment.  So seize it.  I sure plan to!

I’m Barbara Talley, the poet who speaks and inspires.  To find out more about me check out: What Does Barbara Do? or visit  my website.
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5 Tips for Overcoming Fear for Beginning Entrepreneurs

This is 2014, I celebrate 27 years of being in business for myself.  In this series I share twelve  tips on how to not be afraid to go into business.  The first four are: Facing Fear, Having A Compelling Why?, Opportunity, and Timing.

  1. To Fear or Not to Fear Is Not the Deciding Factor:  I started my business in 1987 and I can’t honestly say that I wasn’tafraid back then for I’m sure I felt something.  I could name that energy excitement or name it fear.  But, what I’d like to say about fear is, even if you are afraid, DO IT ANYWAY! You will be afraid sometimes; that’s life.  The only way to overcome fear is to face it. If you allow all of those negative “What If” questions to take hold, you’ll never go into business.   Sometimes that fear is cathartic; other times it’s cancerous.  If it points out essential knowledge, skills, and resources you need, acknowledge it and then figure out how to get what you need.
  2. Our decisions are either FEAR-based or FAITH-based, one excites you, the other paralyzes you.  But in the end, fear is only a thought.  You have to consciously focus on that thought in order for it to derail you.  So the solution is clear. Don’t focus on what you fear or don’t want!  If you want to start a business, you have a lot to be thinking about, the name, the business structure, the product, the team, the marketing (benefits), the money, the audience, the delivery method etc.  Will you go it alone or will you choose at network marketing company. Once you decide you have something viable to offer, focus on that and you’ll have very little time left over to just worry.
  3. Must Have A Compelling Why?– Begin by asking yourself the question, “Why do I want to go into business?” The answer to that question must be compelling enough to carry you through the fear, the doubt, the naysayers, the frustration, and the despair that you will no doubt experience at some time.  My “WHY” was that I wanted to work at home, to be able to guide and protect my kids.  I didn’t know how I was going to do it at that time.  In retrospect, none of that really mattered anyway.  The universe takes care of ‘how’ for committed faithful people.  I just had to DECIDE to do it and set a goal.  If you’ve got something that the world needs, share it! My compelling ‘WHY’ was to save my kids and I didn’t want them to be latch-key kids.  My “WHY” kept me going through the fear.
  4. Seize the Opportunity and Just Do It!= There will never be a perfect time to go into business.  Although I had set a 6-year goal to go into business, I actually accomplished it within a couple of years.  I had to decide to do it and then start doing it. I’d like to say I had a great plan, but I didn’t at first.  Some read a book about how to drive and then drive.  Others, like myself watch other people and then just do it.  I learned how to be in business by “just jumping in.  It was “sink or swim,” so I learned how to swim.  Now if you’ve got the option to dip your feet in the water, by all means, do that if that will ease your fear.  Now, I’ve found that only serious wholehearted and unlimited faith, hard work, and tenacity will keep you going, but first you’ve got to get going.
  5. Don’t Wait for the Perfect Time– There never will be a perfect time.  And, it was not the perfect time for me either.  I was 7 months pregnant, laid off from my job, had a teen on drugs,  had no money to start a business, and within a couple of months I would be giving birth to my 5th child.  But, I didn’t allow excuses into the equation;  I focused on my ‘WHY.”  I had to act like I was in business.  So I started telling folks, setting up my office, and preparing myself.  Word, got around and I got some business and was “in business.

I’m Barbara Talley, The Poet who speaks and inspires.   To find more about me, check out my promo sheet or visit  my website.

6 Ways to Be Happier and Nicer Right Now

One of my daughters used to say, “Be nice, baby,” to everyone when she was about three years old.  I’m wishing the same for you, “Be nice, baby!” When people are nice to us, we are happier. When we make others happy, now that’s pure joy!  We habitually say, “Happy Birthday, Happy Anniversary,  Happy Valentines Day, and “Happy Holidays.”  Why not “Happy Monday, Happy Tuesday, Happy Wednesday, etc?” And while you’re sending out that happy wish why not follow it up with nice thoughts, words, and actions.  Just like gloom is contagious, so is happiness. So go infect others with happiness, by wishing the best for them each day, not just on special days.

You can change your life by changing your words, nice matters.  We can all improve; to get started:

  1. Carry around a notebook the next few days and take note of how kind your words are.
  2. Are they forgiving or intolerant?
  3. Are they judgmental or complimentary?
  4. Do they uplift or dishearten?  Do they encourage or dampen the other person’s spirit?  In short, do your words soothe and inspire the soul of the person hearing them?
  5. Also notice the reactions to your words.
  6. Are they smiling or frowning?  Are they happy or sad?

Also check out this post on ‘5 Simple Ways to Stay Happy‘ by another blogger.

In closing, we’ll get more of our needs met by being nice and we’ll also like that person in the mirror a whole lot more.  With so many things that are out of our control, isn’t it heartwarming to know that some things still are?

I’m Barbara Talley,  The Poet who speaks and inspires.   To find more about me, check out my promo sheet or visit  my website.

All Change Happens in The Current Moment

Do you want to experience significant change right now?  You can,  if you just realize that all change happens only in the current moment.  Master the current moment and master your life.  All you have to do is think, say, and do the right thing in this moment, and the next, and the next.  And guess what, you’ll be different and things will be different!  You can make change right now by doing the following exercise.

Do this exercise right now.

  1. Think of something that you wish to experience or receive more of in your life right now.   Don’t worry; it’s okay to ask.   That’s the only way you will receive and anyway, you deserve it! We live in an abundant, loving, and harmonious universe.  It’s important to see the universe as abundant if you wish to receive from it.  If you see it as limited, shrinking, and hostile, this won’t work for you.  Okay, have something in mind?  Great!
  2. Now think of how you can assist someone else in getting that same thing.  Thought of a person?
  3. Write down their name and prayerfully think of some way to assist that person in some meaningful way.
  4.  NOW DO IT!
  5. Then report back later and share the wonderful results you are destined to experience.

I’m Barbara Talley, The Poet who speaks and inspires.   To find more about me, check out my promo sheet or visit  my website.